when g was here, he sort of balanced everything out. sure, he wrecked my nerves every now and then (& i'm sure he's gotten annoyed by me a few times), but overall he kept me stabilized - facing the harsh realities of the world are so much easier with him in my life. he keeps me smiling and laughing, his sometimes goofy nature loosens me up, he helps guide me spiritually and his persona is like a fresh breath of air - refreshing. he was even there to help me with some of my homework! i'm so glad that he was able to visit - i finally had someone around who is genuine, someone i can fully trust and someone i can be my complete self with and not be judged about my quirkiness or random bouts of awkwardness.
but now that he's gone (and it's only been a day), that terrible feeling is back - the feeling that i was experiencing before i left nashville for winter break. lonely, alienated, and not being able to identify myself with any one group of people. i feel so disconnected. hopefully the feeling will pass soon. hopefully this is just a "i miss gary" phase. hopefully me staying so busy will keep my mind off of some of the things that are bothering me. hopefully it won't bring on more stress.
or maybe i'm feeling all weird/cranky/sentimental because i haven't had more than 6 hours of sleep in the past 48 hours...
yeah... maybe that's it. i'll get some sleep & get back to you all later. and then maybe the ERIN everyone knows and loves will be recovered.
peace.
oh & in attempt to make up for my absence, i'll leave you with a plethora of pictures. (about 3 weeks worth - from bowling, skating, the zoo, the aquarium restaurant & more). enjoy!
7 comments:
1) your beautiful
2) your eyebrows are beautiful, as well
3) i LOVE your pictures from the aquarium/zoo. absolutely breathtaking
4) you guys are beyond cuteee :)
5) you can always talk to me if you need to. i go thru the exact same feeling -- the alienation, loneliness, sadness that you speak of. i see blaine once or twice a month if im lucky, and when im not with him its hard and now i wont be seeing him for some months...but all in all, if you need to talk im here. i understand. youre not alone erinbearin =)
xox thanksss for updating ur blog lol
yay for updates!!!
nice pics! (esp the ones i took or i'm in lol)
hope u got some sleep!
1. thank you.
2. thank you.
3. thank you.
4. thank you.
5. thank you. you're such an amazing, genuine person gabs... i'm glad to have a friend like you. =)
& yes, i've finally updated. there was a brief hiatus... okay, maybe not brief)... but i'm BAAAACCCKKKK!!! back on the bloooccckk. ooohhhh & my nap - absolutely amazing... i'm going back to sleep now. =)
nighty!
You're doin' it girl!
live your dreams!
i'm so proud of you!!! we're gonna be famous you know?
soon we're gonna have to have a guest list for our annual bonfires...LOL!
haha. guest lists for the bonfires.
exaaaaaactly.
let's do this, maaayyynnnee!!!
btw. how's the internship going? you've started, right?
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP AND HAVE ALWAYS WANTED MINE TO BE LIKE THAT...MAYBE ONE DAY IT WILL
lol... be careful what you wish for....
we're NOT perfect... we annoy the hell out of each other & argue... wait scratch that... instead we play the silent game with each other...
all in all though, i do enjoy our relationship...
& worry no more... there's someone for everyone. you'll find your soulmate in due time. =)
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